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00:49 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
ZAVTRA DOMOI V ROSSIU NA 2 NEDELI..TAK MALO

08:15 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
i seriously hate my thoughts. I mean-why why are they driving me crazy so much...none stop. Can i just take them off, illuminate and erase them chert poberi.
This is insane like some freaking sufler sitting in my head and talking bullshit none stop....what to do.
do we always unhappy and unsatisfied with our life? Even when everything seems to be just fine?

08:57 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
time is passing very fast. My first semester in college is over and i have both A+. i am glad. Next one is algebra....in English. This is going to be something.
Few days ago i went out with my girlfriend to the nearest lame lounge. As always full of lonely women and hungry young boys from Turkey.
We took 2 deserts and 2 sangria. And of course hooka. In the beginning lounge was empty but around 11 o'clock it was pretty full. In an hour the owner sent us another free drinks and we were smoking and drinking and dancing. Boys were fooling around but we did not care. What i do care is feeling of getting old. I know 26 is not the end of the world....but it is so not 18....
As usually i smoke to much of hooka and felt bad so i ask her to go home. I should not smoke so much,but i am a big fan of smoke;)
By the way my boyfriend just turned 29 today. Gosh it is almost 30. Furthermore, i gain few pounds and very not happy with that, especially after my yoga teacher moved to NJ and i can't find good classes.

Soon i will go home to Russia. Only for 2 weeks. Such a short time. I am so excited ...i hope they will last longer.

23:17 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
nastroenie dermo. bud to vse ne tak. ludi vokrug grubie, za slovami i ddeistviyami ne sledyat. ya voobshe ochen filtrruu chto govoru. Kogda drugie etogo ne delaut.ya chestno ne ponimau.propast bi ot suda na neskolko nedel a to i mesuacev ili voobshe vse smenit. tolko smelosti net. i nikogda ne bilo....

01:28 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
skoro noviy god-i Vera uje vipolnila zadachi deda moroza-podarki kupleni..ostalos malo..deneg toje ostalos malo

zato priytno
poshla v kollege-bery pervie englishi-i psychologiu-vtoroaya do juti interesna!!! no slojno vse na angliskom...slovarik moi drug
shitau dni do poezdki domoi..do sem'i,vrachey,podrug...i nervnogo podshitivania skolko eshe ostalos do ot'ezda,...i vse po novoi

21:41 

dlya hristi

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?


18:32 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
one of those boring and upsetting days...
if you look deep -nothing bad is going on..but why does it feels so bad?

07:20 

...........just some thoughts

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
Did you ever wanted..that something extraordinary happened to you? Something special..something magically unusual?
I love to imagine different stories, fantasies . Well it might not be a fantasy to someone who has experienced it . Since i was a child a dreamed about it. Wished for it...What does it feels? When you passing by hundreds of people whose life is simple routine and realize that miracle has happened to you.. And you feel something big-huge inside of your heart,your head. They might not ever understand or believe you-and this is definitely the hard part...but would it be meter? If the hole world can't share this miracle with me i would still want to be a part...
How childish it might sound..but i wish to read peoples mind or to be invisible. To disappear in one place and appear at another. To cure or to see future. Is it a curse or a gift? We afraid of things we don't know....we envy people who has thing that we don't.
How indescribably great would it be to fly above all ...with your body and you mind.
How impossible...is it?

06:30 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
nu vot to chto ya jdala 6 let-svershilos!

08:00 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
today i cryed again.
thinking about my family. how difficult is to be so far for so many years. so hard...
i can't find any solution. how to resolve it? imposible?
it is raining. bad wather. all day. we went to sio "rio" cartoon. it is funny. and rio is beautifull. i hope i will see it one day.
am i right? maybe i was not supposed to leave my home...
it is been 6 years. god time passed so fast.
i need to go sleep...but i want to stay in saturday as long as possible.
i ....have time of my life. ..bla bla..

20:49 

;(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?






19:50 

kak ya ego hochu

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
i-pad #2.....omg takoi kleviy

06:01 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
недавно читала свой реальный бумажный дневник. времен когда я еще была в России, встречалась с бывшим и нервничала по поводу мойго приезда в Америку. Вывод-где были мои мозги... Я должна была послать его на три буквы-как только впревые увидела. А в остальном-куда без тяжелых событий....к сожалению так набирается опыт.
Но сравинивая щас себя и тогда....я испытываю облегчение
как тяжело мне было. сколько всего я боялась, неумела. Конечно я и щас много боюсь и неумею....но намного меньше чем 5 лет назад
в такие моменты женские мечты чтоб-мне вновь было 19-просто пугают. низачто не хочу те мозги.
чур меня

07:22 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
по каким то несовсем честным причинам мои волосы впереди начали желтеть
сегодня была в парикмахерской-70 баксов ия как новенькая
ураааааа


кстати я сама наичилась делать гелевые ногти-занимает часа 3 так как делать левую руку еще тот геморрой
но мне нравится

06:17 

я

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?


06:08 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
okie dokie
so i applied for school. yea yeah i know it is a long story...but i start taking personal lessons. personal english lessons.
first one was weird. i felt like-i don't know shit.
i really hope it will get better
what else ..just 1,5 month and will see my dearest family again, can't believe it. and as always three weeks will pas like three days...
awful.
i bought a lot of gifts. some of them i sent via usps. they already arrived.
plus i have bunch of stuff with me. so i'll be like freaking snegurochka.;)
miss them so much. more than 5 years....hm..long time.
when i am there it feels like some kind of dream. i understand where i am...and can't believe it at the same time.
relationship ok. skip it
oh yeah we also going to florida for few days. that should be fun. looking forward to it
ok...

06:11 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
unbelievable...5 years....5 long fucking years and i have nobody-u hear no-body. just him. no friends,-nothing. i can't go out -i don't have anybody. i can't share my fillings,my thoughts,my happy moments... my pain. ...is this always will be this way? than omg.
i am lost. i am angry. i have so much blackness inside-jealousy,trust issues,complains....and more and more
i can't fight with them, i can't bit them. and i am making my life miserable with my own hand.
after this stupid situation i don't want to see his gold friends even more than before! bunch of assholes. two-faced people.
and i am nobody for them.
i hate to be hated and i like to be liked.
fucking theater.
i don't know what to do. i don't want him. most of the time i just want him/me to disappear. DD...common help me out some how.
my family-hates each other. they don't talk to each other. i feel like drinking even tho i don't.and btw i don't sleep. just don't
this is my life

22:45 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
glupo...

05:51 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
kak mne tebya ne hvataet

06:41 

если сварить русалку получится рыбный суп или мясной?
either i am here only when i feel fucked up....or this diary is only about depression
and guess what? i feel fucked up
it is one of those lovely moments when everything-your relationship and your job heaving big and huge damn problems
this monday i was told that i am kinda fired. no not like fired -fired but i have to come to work 5 days like nothing wrong.
they sent me on unemployment. which is only $260 dollars...are u kidding me? what am i supposed to do? how am i supposed to live?
and still come to work.....e moe
and bf of course ...how can somebody act like an asshole 24/7 and pretend like we cool?
we speak different languages ....he does not care about me at all. i mean at all....i am crying none stop for two weeks...which only make him feel sick.

i don't know...it is just so hard..all by ur self
so hard

Вера Т

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